Hello my people!! How are you all doing?
I missed you, did you miss me? I’m sorry I couldn’t write to you last week. It’s not because you aren’t important or I didn’t have what to say, but life happened. I’m sure you know how important you are to me; however, I’ll say it again, so it sinks in nicely. Fam, “you’re important. You’re loved, valued and enough; and I am so thankful to have you as part of my e-family”. Sending you e-hugs. Now, let me give you a quick summary of what happened last week.
I was mentally exhausted! That’s it oh! I know it sounds like no big deal, but I struggled. I felt like I was consistently trying to catch up with my various priorities and failing, so much so that I was exhausted by the thought of trying and almost uninspired to try, but God came through. I kept keeping on and more importantly, I got some much-needed rest and relaxation, recharged myself and encouraged myself in the Lord. Can I hear an amen, somebody? I can joke about it now but honestly; it was a challenging couple of days. Family, it is important to be self-aware, to have healthy support systems, and to know your emotional and mental fillers so you can leverage them at times like these. You don’t want to be faced with such situations and have to deal with it alone. If you’ve never experienced this, just say a word of prayer for those who have. And if you have, like me, felt overrun by your tasks and priorities, or felt attacked by the need to perform and deliver, gather around for a big fat hug and remember that there is more than enough grace at the Father’s feet. At His feet, there is sufficient help, and His strength is available.
I know this may sound contradictory considering this exhaustion incapacitated me for a few days, but in retrospect, I’m very grateful for this experience. In my natural disposition as a learner, I have chosen to focus on the lessons from this experience – as I will now treasure them as I continue my journey towards becoming all that God created me to be.
Alright then, let’s start to outline and discuss the lessons.
Lesson 1: Discern your season!
I started with this because it’s been my biggest lesson to-date. The word discern means to ‘recognize, find out and judge well’ – so in turn, friends, recognize, find out, decipher and judge well the seasons of your life. Don’t let social media, your own expectations, assumptions and comparison tension you out of your sweet spot of grace and wisdom.
Understand what/where God has called you to and stay there even if it seems you’re not ‘shining’. In the words of a wise woman, ‘your time of preparation is even more important than your time of revelation’. It is in your time of preparation (quiet season) that you build the tenacity of character, competence and capacity required in your time of revelation. It is at this time that you seat still at His feet patiently receiving instructions and humbly being refined for your own assignment.
It is in this season that you do the deep work (e.g. create frameworks, models, blueprints, products, solutions; test and refine them, etc.) required for your time of revelation. It is at this phase that you develop character and discipline to endure the required strain needed for refinement.
While here, please don’t give room for negative emotions (e.g. fear, doubt, envy, etc.) to invade your heart, rather cultivate positive emotions (e.g. joy, contentment, peace, gratitude, etc.). Work tenaciously to preserve the fabric of your heart, ensuring it is without guile because as the Bible says, out of it flows the issues of life. In contemporary English, it determines the course of your life.
Another point to note here is that your season for preparation maybe longer than that of your compatriots. Yes, we may be fellow soldiers in arms, but our fields and postings may differ significantly, perhaps needing different levels of cultivation. Yours may need surface tilling, or just watering; whereas mine may need deep work that includes building a custom irrigation system because of the industry or sector I’m called to serve. With the level of work demanded here, our preparation season cannot be the same.
Please remember that your metrics of progress would differ depending on the season you’re in. Progress isn’t just doing, being is also progress. Being patient, yielded and submitted to the tutelage of God and your instructors is progress. Rejoice in your quiet transformation.
Lesson 2: To thyself, be true.
When your emotions are brimming over, please take responsibility for your feelings. Take time out to decipher precisely what you’re feeling. Adequately diagnosing the challenge can help with seeking and identifying the appropriate solution. Let’s conclude by saying, denial isn’t maturity, self-awareness is.
Lesson 3: Intentionally fill up!
I must shout this loud. The truth is that every day, various things, issues, and experiences are making emotional and mental deductions to your bank in varying measures and it is necessary for you to either: fill up faster than you drain or fill up as fast as you drain out.
That said, the next thing to do is to identify what your drainers and fillers are. Once you do, lean into your fillers with an intensity and tenderness that enables you maximize the refreshing they bring. For instance, spending quality time with friends and family, fun conversations, worship, studying my Bible, journaling, good food and rest are major fillers for me so I have learnt to better incorporate this into my day/week irrespective of “how much” work I have lined up. The truth is, I’m even more effective when I can include these into my week while also scheduling time for deep work.
Lesson 4: Pace yourself
Dear friend, you aren’t superwoman or superman! While you may be able to work long hours, speedily create new products, multitask as though you’re an octopus; please remember you’re human. You must learn to set realistic timelines for yourself on projects, enforce boundaries to achieve some balance across your multiple expressions, develop routines, systems and structures to help you become more productive and efficient, and schedule rest and relaxation. Where you find that you’re struggling, please be kind to yourself – give extensions and treat yourself graciously.
Lesson 5: Cultivate true friendships
If like me, you need safe spaces to unburden as part of your reinvigoration process, then cultivate such in your closest allies and friends. These can provide the strength, inspiration, encouragement and insights you need to spur you on.
In all, cherish and appropriately steward your quiet seasons. Don’t ever despise these small beginnings as they are critical to your climax moments.
